A mother describes the profound trauma her son endures after sexual abuse by a friend, as health trusts in Northern Ireland report 231 referrals of young people for harmful sexualised behaviors over the past two years.
Devastating Family Impact
The mother explains that the incident delivers a “devastating impact” on her family, with her son suffering “extreme trauma and stress.” “He feels like his life is changed forever and he’ll never be the same again,” she states. Both she and her husband receive counseling, anxiety mediation, and sleep aids to cope.
Parents often overlook peer-on-peer risks, she notes. “It’s something that as a parent I never thought to discuss with my children,” she says. Conversations focused on adult dangers, not friends. The family grapples with shock and guilt: “You feel responsible that you weren’t aware of the danger and that you didn’t keep your child safe.”
Rising Referrals for Harmful Behaviors
Health trusts across Northern Ireland record 231 referrals in 2024 and 2025 for young people showing harmful sexualised behaviors—actions deemed developmentally inappropriate and abusive, often peer-on-peer abuse. Police data does not specify underage suspect-victim cases due to collation methods.
The NSPCC observes more children reporting such incidents recently. Experts attribute rises to greater awareness and social media’s role. Marcella Leonard, an independent social worker, highlights technology’s influence: peers coerce image-sharing via apps or alter images with AI.
Understanding the Behaviors
Leonard stresses identifying roots: prior abuse, neurodiversity, or intentional harm. Young people now report more confidently. “All of us make mistakes as children, and we have to allow children to make mistakes, to learn and to change their behaviour,” she emphasizes.
Effective sex education proves crucial. “For some children it’s about giving them really good sex education. For some children it will take a lot longer,” Leonard says. She criticizes Northern Ireland’s approach: sex education falls short, entangled with religion.
Relationships and Sex Education in Schools
Every Northern Ireland school must deliver relationships and sex education (RSE), per Department of Education guidelines. A spokesperson confirms significant investments in RSE resources. Schools develop policies with parents and pupils, ensuring programs address harmful behaviors and teach recognition, response, and reporting of peer-on-peer abuse. All students, regardless of gender or faith, participate.
