Pricey Abby: My jealous husband consistently accuses me of wanting to go away him for my male associates

DEAR ABBY: My husband and I’ve been collectively 23 years, married for nearly 9. We’re in our 60s. It’s the second marriage for each of us. I retired as a consequence of having to maneuver to a different state for his job. I make associates wherever I am going and become involved in neighborhood actions. 

My husband has no associates. Significantly. ZERO! He goes to work and comes residence. Through the years, he has accused me of wanting relationships with my male associates (whose wives are additionally my associates) and tells me I ought to simply go on and be proud of the opposite man. Neither my associates nor I’ve ever carried out something to spark his pathological jealousy. 

Presently, I’m on a nonprofit board of administrators and should talk typically with the male president. He has develop into the brand new goal. Counseling is out of the query as a result of psychiatry is my husband’s specialty. Additionally, he appears to assume he’s all the time proper about all the things. He has by no means issued an apology so long as I’ve identified him. 

I don’t reply to his tirades as a result of it’s pointless, however I’m sick and uninterested in his habits and thought course of. I perceive the “why” to this habits (his heritage and surroundings), however that doesn’t give him carte blanche to make use of it as an excuse. Any recommendations for transferring ahead? — WEARY IN FLORIDA

DEAR WEARY: From what you’ve written, your delinquent husband is a bottomless vessel of insecurity. Should you haven’t been in a position to assuage it in all these years, I doubt you ever will. Many psychotherapists use psychological well being professionals themselves. However except your husband is keen to confess that maybe he, and never you, is the issue and seeks assist, nothing will change. Frankly, I’m stunned your marriage has lasted this lengthy. Is that this the way you need to reside the remainder of your life? Answering that query is the best way to maneuver ahead. 

DEAR ABBY: I do business from home a couple of days per week and reside a block from the native center faculty. Not too long ago, I’ve damaged up a bunch of youngsters in my yard hitting and preventing with one another. I don’t know these children, don’t have any kids in class and understand that is an ongoing concern. I’m not sure the right way to deal with it. 

I may ignore it, however I’m afraid not solely that one of many children will get harm, but in addition {that a} guardian could be upset that this occurred on my property. I may report it to the police, however which may be overkill. I may additionally attempt reaching out to the college, however with none info on who these children are, I’m undecided that will be a lot assist both. Any concepts? — WITNESS IN OHIO

DEAR WITNESS: I do have a suggestion. You may have already spoken to the youngsters concerned in these altercations. You’re right that there might be legal responsibility if a number of of them are injured in your property. Contact the principal of the center faculty and clarify what has been happening. As soon as that’s carried out, name or go to the police division and report that your yard is being changed into a battleground. Should you do, the subsequent time one thing begins occurring and also you name the police, they might reply shortly.

Pricey Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, often known as Jeanne Phillips, and was based by her mom, Pauline Phillips. Contact Pricey Abby at http://www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Field 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.