Life within the British Royal Family, often referred to as ‘The Firm,’ comes with a unique set of expectations and protocols. While not always codified in law, these guidelines shape public appearances, personal interactions, and even private moments for its members. These unwritten rules, some practical and others seemingly peculiar, ensure the monarchy maintains its image and decorum. Let’s explore some of the most notable aspects of royal etiquette.
Public Displays of Affection and Professionalism
Members of the Royal Family generally maintain a professional demeanor in public, rarely engaging in overt displays of affection like prolonged hand-holding or kissing. This practice is not necessarily a strict prohibition but rather a conscious choice reflecting their role as working representatives of the Crown. Royal editor Emily Nash explained that during official engagements, where they are ‘at work,’ such public intimacy would be considered unprofessional. Furthermore, the practicalities of meeting numerous people and shaking hands often make such displays impractical. While affectionate moments may surface during more informal or light-hearted occasions, formal settings call for a more reserved approach.
Traditional Greetings: Bows and Curtsies
When meeting members of the Royal Family, there are no mandatory codes of conduct, but many choose to observe traditional forms of greeting. As noted on the Royal Family’s official website, men typically offer a slight bow of the head, while women may perform a small curtsy. These gestures are a way of showing respect for the institution and its members.
Marriage Proposals and Royal Consent
For the most senior members of the Royal Family, seeking permission from the reigning monarch is a requirement before a marriage proposal can be made. This tradition, rooted in historical acts like the Royal Marriages Act 1772, ensures the monarch’s approval for unions that could impact the line of succession. Following the monarch’s consent, an engagement is formally announced, sometimes accompanied by a press briefing.
Accepting Gifts: Navigating Generosity
Royals receive a multitude of gifts during public engagements and international tours. However, a clear policy governs what can and cannot be accepted. The overarching principle, as outlined in the gifts policy, is to avoid accepting anything that could create an obligation to the donor. Gifts from UK businesses are typically declined unless they serve as souvenirs of an official visit or mark a significant personal occasion. Public bodies and charities, especially those with established connections to a royal, may present gifts. While members of the public can offer smaller items like flowers, food, consumables, and non-controversial books, gifts exceeding £150 in value are generally not accepted. Buckingham Palace annually publishes a list of official gifts received.
Travel Precautions: Heirs and Flights
A long-standing, though not absolute, guideline suggests that heirs to the throne should not travel on the same flight. This precaution is in place to safeguard the royal lineage in the unlikely event of a disaster. While practical considerations have led to exceptions, with senior royals like Prince William and his son Prince George having flown together on numerous occasions, such travel typically requires the monarch’s explicit permission.
Dress Code Considerations: Hosiery and Mourning Attire
While not always strictly enforced, there has been a historical preference for royal women to wear hosiery for formal events, a tradition observed by the late Queen Elizabeth II. This practice has been noted in the attire of the Princess of Wales and the Duchess of Sussex. Separately, a crucial protocol dictates that royals must pack an all-black outfit when traveling abroad. This is in preparation for the unfortunate event of a death within the Royal Family or the nation, requiring them to be dressed in mourning attire immediately.
Maintaining Political Neutrality
Members of the Royal Family are expected to remain strictly neutral on political matters. While the monarch is legally permitted to vote, it is considered unconstitutional for them to do so. The King, as Head of State, must maintain impartiality, and thus, royals do not publicly express political opinions or hold political office. This neutrality is vital to prevent the monarchy from influencing political discourse or legislation.
Sitting and Dining Etiquette
Specific postures are encouraged for royal women, with a general discouragement of crossing legs at the knee. Instead, keeping knees and ankles together, with legs slanted to one side (popularly known as ‘the Duchess slant’), is preferred. When dining with the monarch, a strict rule dictates that everyone at the table must stop eating the moment the King or Queen finishes their meal, regardless of individual progress. This ensures the monarch sets the pace for the entire event.
Addressing Royalty and Avoiding Autographs
Formal address for the King is ‘Your Majesty,’ followed by ‘Sir.’ For the Queen, it is ‘Your Majesty,’ then ‘Ma’am.’ Other senior royals are addressed as ‘Your Royal Highness,’ followed by ‘Sir’ or ‘Ma’am.’ A firm rule prohibits royals from signing autographs for the public, primarily to prevent forgery. While they may sign official documents or guest books, personal autograph requests are politely declined.
Restrictions on Commercial Activities and Board Games
Senior working members of the Royal Family are not permitted to earn an income. This rule was a significant factor in Prince Harry and Meghan Markle’s decision to step back from royal duties to pursue financial independence. On a lighter note, the board game Monopoly is reportedly banned from royal Christmas celebrations due to its tendency to incite arguments, reflecting a desire for harmonious family gatherings.
The Nuances of Selfies and Public Interaction
While outright bans on selfies are not always in place, royals generally prefer to avoid them, often focusing on their engagements. Prince Harry has famously expressed his dislike for selfies, encouraging fans to opt for traditional photographs. The late Queen Elizabeth II found the prevalence of selfie-taking disconcerting, noting a missed opportunity for genuine eye contact. However, in recent years, some younger royals, like the Prince and Princess of Wales, have been seen participating in selfies during public appearances, suggesting a slight evolution in this aspect of royal protocol.
Conclusion: A Balancing Act of Tradition and Modernity
The etiquette surrounding the British Royal Family is a complex tapestry woven from centuries of tradition, practical necessity, and a desire to maintain a distinct public image. These rules, from how to sit and greet to how to travel and accept gifts, all contribute to the unique position the monarchy holds. While some protocols may seem unusual to outsiders, they serve to uphold the institution’s continuity and its role in national life, navigating the delicate balance between historical precedent and the demands of the modern world.
