At over 1,700 years outdated, Santa Claus might most likely train biohackers like Bryan Johnson, Dave Asprey and Gary Brecka a factor or two about longevity.
However it might appear fairly clear that it’s magic — not dietary supplements, surprise medication like GLP-1s or high-tech “human optimization units” — that has maximized his life span.
That’s very true as a result of, in line with many consultants, Mr. Claus is in danger for many severe well being circumstances as a result of his less-than-optimal life-style.
Scientists and medical doctors level to Santa’s weight problems, poor weight-reduction plan, doubtlessly excessive stress ranges and repeated chimney journeys as main threats to his well being.
“I’m assured that he would profit from therapy of each diabetes and hypertension,” Annika Rosengren, a professor on the Division of Emergency and Cardiovascular Drugs at College of Gothenburg in Sweden, stated in a 2009 report.
“And cholesterol-lowering medication would most likely not damage both. As if that wasn’t sufficient, new analysis exhibits that his stomach weight problems is a threat issue for dementia.”
Poor weight-reduction plan
The Swedish researchers famous that residing within the North Pole means Mr. and Mrs. Claus have some wholesome meals out there to them, together with spring water, reindeer meat and salmon.
However households world wide go away him treats that aren’t so good for you — and positively not within the portions he eats. These embody cookies and milk within the US, cookies and beer in Australia, rice pudding in Denmark and Sweden, and candy mince pies and sherry within the UK.
“His [lung] capability could also be such that wheezy monosyllabic utterances, resembling ‘ho ho ho,’ are all that he can routinely muster.”
Dr. Roshan Vijayan
“Mr. Claus eats an excessive amount of sugar and saturated fats,” careworn Mette Axelsen, a senior lecturer within the Division of Scientific Vitamin at College of Gothenburg. “The meals that individuals give him are very power dense. I’m pondering of sweet, rice pudding and high-fat cuts of meat. Folks usually achieve about half a kilo (1.1 kilos) over Christmas.”
An excessive amount of sugar will increase the danger of sort 2 diabetes, coronary heart illness, fatty liver illness, hypertension and irritation, whereas overloading on saturated fats can construct up in your arteries, elevate your ldl cholesterol, and up your threat for coronary heart illness and stroke.
Sleep apnea, diabetes and diverticulosis
Dr. Janneme Frouws, who famous that she does “not personally deal with Santa Claus,” warned of the well being points she thinks he’s going through within the British Columbia Medical Journal.
She recognized him with obstructive sleep apnea, which may improve the dangers of assault, stroke, hypertension and sort 2 diabetes.
In actual fact, she thinks he like already has sort 2 diabetes, a persistent situation that requires ongoing administration and might result in different well being issues like coronary heart illness, hypertension and ldl cholesterol, kidney failure, gum illness, digestive points, nerve harm and blindness.
She additionally suspects he has diverticulosis, an intestinal situation linked to weight problems, a weight-reduction plan low in fiber, and too-little train.
Coronary heart illness
Whereas his weight-reduction plan and weight put him in danger for coronary heart illness, his exercise patterns could possibly be gearing him up for a catastrophic coronary heart occasion. For 364 days of the yr, Santa is essentially sedentary — since his elves are identified to make and wrap the presents.
All of that’s disrupted by one night time of maximum bodily exertion has he flies world wide delivers items, which he carries himself down chimneys. It’s unclear if Santa does any lifting or cardio within the gymnasium to organize.
Lung points
Does anybody truly clear their chimneys earlier than Santa involves city? It doesn’t appear so, which means he’s been uncovered to fairly a little bit of soot over the centuries.
“It appears possible that cumulative publicity to those circumstances may end in some type of persistent interstitial lung illness whereas alighting in tobacco smoke-filled residing rooms may contribute an obstructive part,” Dr. Roshan Vijayan wrote in The BMJ.
“Certainly his practical residual capability could also be such that wheezy monosyllabic utterances, resembling ‘ho ho ho,’ are all that he can routinely muster, with the break neck speeds of his open sleigh essential to ship steady optimistic airway stress assist.
Santa wants a check-up, STAT
In one more article revealed within the journal JAMDA, Dr. John E. Morley speculated that St. Nick could possibly be in danger for:
- Hhypertension
- Coronary artery illness
- Hypertriglyceridemia
- Nonalcoholic fatty liver illness
- Deep vein thrombosis
- Pulmonary embolus
And a super-spreader as well
From the flu to COVID to common outdated colds, Santa is definitely uncovered to all the pieces as he travels to tens of millions of properties world wide — and he’s probably bringing these germs to the following home he pops into.
Then there’s all the pieces he’s choosing up at mall photoshoots.
“Unsuspecting little Johnny will get to sit down on Santa’s lap, however in addition to his presents he will get H1N1 influenza,” Dr. Nathan Grills wrote in The British Medical Journal (BMJ) in 2009.
In actual fact, Dr. Mark Dembert, an epidemiologist, even wrote concerning the phenomenon of “Sick Santa Syndrome” in a medical journal again in 1986.
“I do know of no epidemiologic work revealed on the morbidity related to being Santa Claus,” he stated. “Nevertheless, my background as an infectious illness epidemiologist and my a number of years of expertise as a seasonal however well-traveled Santa for teenagers and adults alike immediate me to explain a brand new syndrome.”
Sick Santa Syndrome, he stated, has some mixture of the next signs: low-grade fever, muscle aches and pains, headache, nasal congestion, delicate sinusitis, painful swallowing, cough, elevated thirst, decreased urge for food and enlarged lymph nodes.
“There’s infant can do to forestall the syndrome. Influenza photographs are warranted for this high-risk inhabitants. Nutritional vitamins could also be worthwhile,” he wrote.
